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145 Funny Graduation Quotes

It’s hard work to get to graduation day and you are finally there. Now it’s time to celebrate, and what better way than with a great quote? And we think that when it comes to graduation quotes, funny ones are the best so we have gathered all the best funny graduation quotes so you don’t need to waste time thinking of what to say.

We have also included some funny graduation captions for when you need something to go with that perfect grad post.

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So if you are celebrating your own grad or congratulating someone else, you will find the best funny quotes about graduation here.

If you like these funny graduation quotes and sayings, you should also check out our lists of Short Funny Quotes, Funny Good Morning QuotesFunny Love QuotesFunny Work QuotesFunny Quotes of the DayFunny Quotes About Life and Funny Inspirational Quotes.

Scroll on through to find your favorite funny grad quotes now!

Funny Graduation Quotes

Here are few great funny graduation quotes.

  1. “You are educated. Your certification is in your degree. You may think of it as the ticket to the good life. Let me ask you to think of an alternative. Think of it as your ticket to change the world.” —Tom Brokaw

2. “Education makes a people easy to lead, but difficult to drive: easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.” —Henry Peter Brougham

3. “We may live in an age of instant messaging, instant gratification and Instagram, but there is no way to short circuit the path to success.” —Tory Burch

4. “Big pay and little responsibility are circumstances seldom found together.”-Napoleon Hill

5. “Education is our passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to the people who prepare for it today.” —Malcolm X

6. “Intelligence plus character—that is the goal of true education.” —Martin Luther King Jr.

7. “The highest result of education is tolerance.” —Helen Keller

8. “A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that “individuality” is the key to success.” – Robert Orben

Sunrise with graduation quotes funny by Orben

9. “Graduation is not the end; it’s the beginning.” —Senator Orrin Hatch

10. “Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” —Arthur Ashe

11. “There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.” —C.S. Lewis

12. “I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which was that you can fail at what you don’t want, so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.” —Jim Carrey

13. “Your life is your story, and the adventure ahead of you is the journey to fulfill your own purpose and potential.” —Kerry Washington

14. “What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

15. “The only thing you can do in this life is pursue your passions, celebrate your bloopers and never stop following your fear.” —Grace Helbig

16. “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. “Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.” —Winston Churchill

17. “The old rules are crumbling and nobody knows what the new rules are. So make up your own rules.” —Neil Gaiman

Person walking with funny graduation quotes by Gaiman

18. “It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all—in which case, you fail by default.” —J.K. Rowling

19. “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.” —Henry David Thoreau

20. “Now go, and make interesting mistakes, make amazing mistakes, make glorious and fantastic mistakes. Break rules. Leave the world more interesting for you being here. Make good art.” —Neil Gaiman

21. “If you hear a voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.” —Vincent Van Gogh

Short Funny Graduation Quotes for Instagram

We think that when it comes to short graduation quotes funny ones are the best. If you like these short funny graduation quotes for Instagram, you will also love our list of Short Quotes. Now check out these funny graduation one liners.

22. “What we learn with pleasure we never forget.” —Alfred Mercier

23. “An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.” —Benjamin Franklin

24. Instruction ends in the schoolroom, but education ends only with life.” —Frederick W. Robertson

25. “The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.” —B.B. King

Sunset with short funny graduation quotes for Instagram

26. “Your education is a dress rehearsal for a life that is yours to lead.” —Nora Ephron

27. “The fireworks begin today. Each diploma is a lighted match. Each one of you is a fuse.” —Edward Koch

28. “What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to the human soul.” —Joseph Addison

29. “Kid, you’ll move mountains.” —Dr. Seuss

30. “There are no regrets in life. Just lessons.” —Jennifer Aniston

31. “When you leave here, don’t forget why you came.” —Adlai E. Stevenson

32. Explore. Dream. Discover.” —Mark Twain

33. “Get busy living or get busy dying.” —Stephen King

34. “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” —Steve Jobs

35. “You can never be overdressed or overeducated.” —Oscar Wilde

36. “Do not let making a living prevent you from making a life.” —John Wooden

37. “Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.” – Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Person walking by lighthouse with motivational quotes about life by Hule

38. “Opportunity does not knock, it presents itself when you beat down the door.” —Kyle Chandler

39. “Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.” —Oscar Wilde

40. “Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.” —Will Rogers

41. “The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs . . . one step at a time.” —Joe Girard

42. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” —Thomas Edison

43. “The future depends on what you do today.” – Mahatma Gandhi

Hiker looking at mountain with short inspirational work quotes by Gandhi

44. “The road to success is always under construction.” —Lily Tomlin

45. “Follow your fear.” —Tina Fey

46. “Wherever you go, go with all your heart.” —Confucius

47. “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” —Truman Capote

48. “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” —Milton Berle

Funny Grad Quotes

Check out these funny grad quotes.

49. “In response to those who say to stop dreaming and face reality, I say keep dreaming and make reality.” —Kristian Kan

50. “You have to dance a little bit before you step out into the world each day, because it changes the way you walk.” —Sandra Bullock

51. “If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.” —Thomas Jefferson

52. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” —Thomas Edison

53. “Follow your passion. Stay true to yourself. Never follow someone else’s path, unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. By all means, you should follow that.” —Ellen DeGeneres

54. “You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose.” —Dr. Seuss

Person looking at water with funny grad quotes by Suess

55. “Your families are extremely proud of you. You can’t imagine the sense of relief they are experiencing. This would be a most opportune time to ask for money.” —Gary Bolding

56. “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.” —Mark Twain

57. “To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you too may one day be president of the United States.” —George W. Bush

58. “Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” —Charles Schulz

59. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” —Betty Reese

60. “There may be days when you’ll say to yourself, ‘I can’t. I literally can’t even.’ But you can! You can even!” —Katie Couric

61. “A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car, but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.” —Theodore Roosevelt

62. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well neither does bathing; that’s why we recommend it daily.” —Zig Ziglar

Ocean waves with funny motivation Thursday quotes by Ziglar

63. “Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.” —Henry Ford

64. “Graduation is only a concept. In real life every day you graduate. Graduation is a process that goes on until the last day of your life. If you can grasp that, you’ll make a difference.” —Arie Pencovici

65. “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” —Alexander Graham Bell

66. “By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” —Confucius

Inspirational Funny Quotes About Graduation

If you like this list of inspirational funny quotes about graduation, you might also like our lists of  Funny Inspirational Quotes,  Short Inspirational Quotes, Inspirational Morning Quotes, Inspirational Quotes for Today, and Inspirational Quotes for Work.

67. “Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.” – Winnie the Pooh

68. “Do or do not. There is no try. “ — Yoda

69. “The road to success is always under construction.” – Lily Tomlin

70. “The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.” – Abraham Lincoln

71. “Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” – Dale Carnegie

72. “Confidence is 10% work and 90% delusion.” – Tina Fey

73. “It’s okay to look at the past and the future. Just don’t stare.” — Benjamin Dover

Mountain reflected in lake at sunset with funny inspirational quotes by Dover

74. “Aspire to inspire before we expire.” — Eugene Bell Jr.

75. “Nothing is impossible. The word itself says “I’m possible!” – Audrey Hepburn

76. “To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.” – Ashleigh Brilliant

77. “If you come to a fork in the road, take it.” – Yogi Berra

78. “The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.” – Will Rogers

79. “Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.” – Steven Wright

80. “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.”– Milton Berle

81. “Be not afraid of going slowly, be afraid only of standing still.” –Chinese Proverb

82. “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” – Oscar Wilde

83. “And remember, no matter where you go, there you are.” – Confucius

84. “Life would be tragic if it weren’t funny.” – Stephen Hawking

85. “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” — Robin Williams

Person looking at sunset with funny quotes that inspire by Robin Williams

86. “Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” — Dr. Seuss

87. “Bad decisions make good stories.” — Ellis Vidler

88. “See the world like a big wardrobe. Everybody has his own costume. There is only one that fits you perfectly.” — George Harris

89. “If a cluttered desk is a sign of a cluttered mind, of what, then, is an empty desk a sign?” — Albert Einstein

90. “Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else.” – Will Rogers

91. “I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” – Steven Wright

92. “If you don’t know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else.” — Yogi Berra

93. “Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were gonna do anyway.“ — Robert Downey Jr.

94. “To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.” — Reba McEntire

95. “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.” — Mark Twain

96. “Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.” — Elbert Hubbard

Tree in water with funny inspirational quotes for life lessons by Hubbard

97. “When life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade and then try to find someone whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.” — Ron White

98. “Life isn’t finding shelter in the storm. It’s about learning to dance in the rain.” — Sherrilyn Kenyon

99. “I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. Get busy living or get busy dying.” — Shawshank Redemption

100. “Turn every life situation into a positive one.” – Rhonda Byrne

101. “Just for the record darling, not all positive change feels positive in the beginning.” —S. C. Lourie

102. “You do not find the happy life. You make it.” —Thomas S. Monson

103. “Positive energy knows no boundaries.” – Lu Wei

104. “Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale.” — Hans Christian Andersen

105. “The truly rich are those who enjoy what they have.” —Yiddish Proverb

106. “One small positive thought can change your whole day.” – Zig Ziglar

107. “Life is short. Be silly. Have fun. Regret nothing.” – Karen Salmansohn

108. “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?” — Captain Jack Sparrow

109. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” — Thomas Edison

110. “When life brings big winds of change that almost blow you over, close your eyes, hang on tight, and believe.” — Lisa Lieberman-Wang

111. “To change your life, change something you do daily.” ― Robert Celner

Funny College Graduation Quotes

Here are some excellent funny college graduation quotes. Find your favorite funny quotes for college graduates now!

112. “Nothing is going to be handed to you. You have to make things happen.” – Florence Griffith-Joyner

113. “It is not the size of the arena in which you find yourself that counts; it is what you do with it.” – Dr. Irene C. Kassorla

114. “Commencement speeches were invented largely in the belief that outgoing college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated.” – Garry Trudeau

Sunrise with funny college graduation quotes by Trudeau

115. “Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers

116. “Struggling to decide what to do after graduation is, and always will be, a sort of rite of passage to the next phase of your life.” Gloria Davidson

117. “Don’t ever rob a bank. Enjoy life. Have fun. Choose to be happy now; don’t wait until you’re ‘successful,’ because honestly, I was as happy when we were unemployed and scrounging around for a buck.” – Peter Farrelly

118. “Minds are like parachutes – they only function when open.” – Thomas Dewar

119. “It is clear the future holds great opportunities. It also holds pitfalls. The trick will be to avoid the pitfalls, seize the opportunities, and get back home by six o’clock.” – Woody Allen

120. “Remember, when it come to applying for jobs, books ARE judged by their cover!” – Patricia Akins

121. “Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After twenty-two years of child-raising, they are unemployed.” – Erma Bombeck

122. “Applying common sense helps us find simple and reasonable ways of doing things. Many refer to this as the KISS method, ‘Keep It Simple Simon.'” – Henry Adkins

123. “We don’t stop going to school when we graduate.” – Carol Burnett

124. “The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” – Sarah Brown

125. “Each year at graduation, I am obliged to offer a few ‘brief remarks,’ which are usually not as brief as they should be.” – James E. Ryan

126. “Life is my college. May I graduate well, and earn some honors!” – Louisa May Alcott

127. “If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead anywhere.” – Frank A. Clark

128. “It has been my observation that most people get ahead during the time that others waste.” – Henry Ford

129. “Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

130. “Just remember, you can’t climb the ladder of success with your hands in your pockets.” – Arnold Schwarzenegger

131. “The man who graduates today and stops learning tomorrow is uneducated the day after.” – Newton D. Baker

132. “The world does not pay for what a person knows. It pays for what a person does with what she knows.” – Hyacinth Mottley

133. “A river cuts through rock not because of its power but because of its persistence.” – Proverb

134. “The trouble with learning from experience is that you never graduate.” – Doug Larson

Funny High School Graduation Quotes

Check out these funny high school graduation quotes.

136. “Graduation day is tough for adults. They go to the ceremony as parents. They come home as contemporaries. After 22 years of child-raising, they are unemployed.” —Erma Bombeck

137. “Now that you’ve graduated, just remember: Bosses don’t usually accept notes from your mother.” —Melanie White

Sunrise with funny high school graduation quotes by White

138. “That means that this is the first day of the last day of your life. No, that’s wrong. This is the last day of the first day of school. Nope, that’s worse. This is a day.” -Andy Samberg

139. “I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it.” —Harry S. Truman

140. “A person soon learns how little he knows when a child begins to ask questions.” —Richard L. Evans

141. “It is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.” —George Burns

142. “My dear terrified graduates, you are about to enter the most uncertain and thrilling period of your lives. The stories you are about to live are the ones you will be telling your children, and grandchildren, and therapists.” – Lin-Manuel Miranda

143. “If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make something out of you.” – Muhammad Ali

144. “I mean we all fly. Once you leave the ground, you fly. Some people fly longer than others.” – Michael Jordan

145. “If learning is like a sponge, don’t ever stop soaking it up. Never stop learning.” – Catherine Pulsifer

Funny Graduation Captions

Here are a few of our favorites from our list of Funny Graduation Captions. You might also like our lists of High Schoo Graduation Captions, Funny Captions and Motivational Captions.

  • Can I take a nap now?
  • I got the skills to pay the bills.
  • Very proud, very tired.
  • What, like it’s hard?
  • And so the adventure begins.
  • Turns out I wasn’t too cool for school.
  • Graduate: (N.) A person who now has carpal tunnel from note-taking.
  • Some graduate with honors, I am just honored to graduate.
  • I want to thank Google, Wikipedia, and whoever invented copy and paste.
  • Now, it’s hotter in here by one degree.
  • I graduated, so now I’m like all smart and stuff.
Sunset with funny graduation Instagram captions
  • Thank you Mom, Dad, and coffee.
  • Graduation time: Now it is real. Getting ready for the party.
  • I usually wear a crown, but today, I guess this cap will do.
  • Call me a chemistry cylinder because I am graduated.
  • One step closer.
  • I’m 100% certain that I am zero percent sure of what I’m going to do.
  • Graduation, aka the day your parents start collecting interest.
  • Cap. Gown. It’s going down.
Sunset with funny graduation captions
  • The only thing harder than getting through school was picking out my graduation outfit.
  • Fasten your seatbelt, it’s about to be a wild ride.
  • Well, I am not usually one for speeches, so goodbye.
  • See mom? I told you I didn’t just play video games all the day.
  • The smell of opportunities.
  • I’m 100% certain that I am zero percent sure of what I’m going to do.
  • Reach for the stars. You might become one.
  • You’re off to great places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting, so get on your way!
  • Let me put that “hire me” sign on my front lawn now.
  • I came, I saw, I conquered.
  • May your cap fly high
Above the clouds with short funny captions about graduation
  • That’s all folks.
  • Next stop: Adulting
  • Proud of my B.S.
  • I owe my diploma to coffee.
  • I graduated, and I am still clueless.
  • If it excites you and scares you at the same time, it probably means you should do it.
  • I already forgot everything.
  • Now, who is going to pay off these loans?
  • The first step is just showing up.
  • No more pencils, no more books, no more teachers’ dirty looks.
  • “Well, that was easy!” —no one ever.
  • It’s not a tiara, but it will do for now.
  • Blessed and stressed.
  • The future looks bright, and I will keep on shining.
  • The tassel was worth the hassle.
Sunset with cute funny grad captions
  • The future is so bright, I have gotta wear shades!
  • Don’t compare me to others. There’s no competition. I’m one of a kind.
  • Class is dismissed…forever!
  • Con-grad-ulations.
  • I’m ready to party!
  • Wait, I passed?
  • Time to walk across the stage in my weird little hat and wizard robe unto the future.
  • As I graduate today, I’d like to thank those who got me here: Google, coffee, and a strong WiFi connection.
  • I mean, finally!
  • This is my fancy piece of paper so I can finally earn some green paper.
  • I’m so glad I could spend all those years and money for THIS piece of paper.

And that’s our list of funny quotes for graduation! We hope you found the perfect one.

Now get out there and celebrate!

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