Yes, it’s that time of year again. The time when our 2 months on Lake Atitlan are up and we needed to shift our thinking from questions like:
Which hike should we do this Thursday?
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How far should we swim today?
Those clouds are weird, right?
To newer, slightly more stressful questions, like:
Which do you think is older, me or this chicken bus?
Do Guatemalan customs officers ACTUALLY give a shit about this QR code?
What are the odds United Airlines misplaces our bag somewhere between Guatemala, Chicago, Munich and Tunis?
Such hardships, I know. Nevertheless, we had another thoroughly enjoyable stay here on one of the most beautiful lakes in the world. A lot of same ol’, same ol’, which can sometimes be a very good thing, such as when talking about perfect weather or volcano views from bed. Not as wonderful when it comes to hit and miss Guatemalan milk. But still.
So, now the time has come for me to answer some of the most notable, memorable and unsavoury questions you may not have thought about asking but which I still really want to answer.
Lake Atitlan 2025 FAQ
Does that look different to you?
Maybe not such a notable question as a predictable one and, dare I say, an unavoidable one. Our first week is typically spent pointing out every little difference from last year, from the relatively-significant-to-us to the less-important-yet-still-noteworthy-in-the-context-of-our-rigid-Guatemalan routines:
San Juan broke ground on an ambitious new water park.
Our favourite San Marcos draft beer place shut down (although the tap just moved to a new bar 100m away).
The town of San Marcos is trying – and apparently failing – to drill a controversial new well right in the centre of their only public square.
The tortilla tienda is bigger now.
El Barrio stopped serving their famous weekend brunch.
San Pedro moved their main market from the middle of town WAY up to the top of the hill to make room for… some parking, I guess?
On a related note, San Pedro has banned all parking on the streets. Which seems flawed.
Our favourite San Marcos tienda now sells Campbell’s mushroom soup.
Parque Chuiraxamolo built some new viewpoints, one in the shape of a heart.
We found a mosquito in our apartment.
Last year the Santa Clara dump was nearly full. This year it is overfull. And smoldering.
Elephant Rock. The rock isn’t new, but us hiking to it is.
Indigo significantly reduced the size of their nachos.
Unlike our last visit to the San Juan viewpoint, Bill refused to ride the giant rooster. Laynni was right into it, though.
How small is that gecko, right?
For a couple weeks there was a tiny gecko wandering around our apartment. Cute as a button, but far more jittery. And maybe not the brightest. One day he seemed trapped in the sink and I had to fish him out with a piece of paper and a shot glass. Strong, though, since he had no problem pushing that little shot glass clear across the table.
Although, a couple days later when he seemed to be on the hunt – quite unsuccessfully, it seemed – I tried to help out by killing an ant and pushing it right next to his head. Nothing. No reaction. So, either he wasn’t as hungry as he was letting on, or maybe just not smart enough to recognize a free meal when he saw one. He sure could get his wiggle on, though.
A Birthday Jump?
In the past, several times per year we would contort our bodies into broad approximations of numbers in order to create photographic evidence of our commitment to the birthday celebrations of various young family members. We stopped doing it, though, because A) the novelty had worn off, and B) I was never flexible enough to successfully imitate any number besides “1”.
However, feeling abnormally spry and playful one morning on the dock, I suggested that in honour of our nephew Gibson’s birthday, Laynni should record me not only shaping myself into the spitting image of the number 9, but doing so in mid-air while launching myself out into the lake. As massive Volcan San Pedro loomed over me. Admiringly, I imagined. I think it went pretty well.
A New Hummingbird Nest?
Indeed. Those of you who follow us may remember about 7 years back a hummingbird built a nest in our palapa, laid 2 eggs, those eggs hatched, followed by a surprisingly contentious naming ceremony that resulted in the rather disappointing choices of Cortez and Bijou. Or you might not remember, considering it was a weird, barely notable story about random birds 7 years ago.
Either way, we were excited to see a new nest suddenly appear this year. Smaller, although more strategically placed, close to the roof for safety, but making it inconveniently difficult to get a useful photo. Anyway, a couple weeks passed, the mom (named Hummie by Laynni, no discussion allowed) spent most of her time sitting on the eggs, one day we saw her tongue for some reason, then another day she wasn’t around but we noticed a tiny beak sticking out the top.
All quite neat, I’d say, although it gets a bit darker from there. Our neighbour managed to get a clear enough video to show that the nest now only held one live chick. And, we hadn’t seen any movement from mom OR baby in a couple days. Probably not a good sign. And the naming ceremony was put on hold. But it was a fun story for awhile, right?
Binge drinking, at your age?
First there was a pool party, doubling as a going-away shindig, with booze and swimming and pizza and popcorn and brownies and giant BBQ shrimp and probably at least one drink past where we should have stopped.
Then… the very next day… it was pub crawl time (what are we, 45?). Beer, burgers, tequila shots, more beer, a couple more beer, then made it back home just in time for Happy Hour. And, you guessed it, more beer. Weirdly thirsty the next day.
What the hell is Fuego playing at?
Quick backstory: Volcan Fuego is near Antigua and has been delighting the masses with small, apparently safe (?) eruptions day and night for several years now. We can even see them from the lake. So, every day, dozens of eager tourists tackle the exhausting 1,600m elevation gain hike to the top of Volcan Acatenango to spend the night and enjoy close-up views of this extraordinary – and extraordinarily photogenic – phenomenon.
Then one day in January, the eruptions just… stopped. And with the exception of a few small, barely noticeable leaks – like a sudden tiny fart so quick you wonder if you imagined it – Fuego is still basically dormant over a month later. So, besides the obvious detrimental effect this has had on one of Guatemala’s most popular tourist activities, that seems problematic right?
I mean, for many years there was so much hot gas and burning lava and whatever else volcanoes are made of that it had to explode out the top every, say, half an hour. Yet now it’s just, you know, not exploding. Well, what the hell is it doing down there? I don’t want to say “biding it’s time”, necessarily, because it’s not like it’s a jilted lover waiting for just the right time to spring a positive herpes test, but that’s kind of what I’m thinking.
To be continued.
What’s the latest with the scorpions?
Well, first of all, there were fewer this year. So that’s good. And I caught two scorpions having sex, which was new for me. Not particularly “sensual”, I wouldn’t say, more “gross”. I still killed them both, regardless. And one day Laynni was just about to put on a clean pair of underwear when, lo and behold, what is that there do you think? Well, that my dear, is a tiny scorpion. Oh. Ohhh. Eew. Well, that would have sucked. I mean, really, really sucked.
How’d the Decathlon go?
In case you aren’t familiar, a few years back we started an annual Pasajcap tradition of competing in 10 highly demanding – yet ultimately ridiculous – games in a single afternoon. Games ranging from Tippy Cup to Egg Toss to Poop the Potato to various events involving water and/or duct tape.
Then a couple years ago it occurred to us that 10 events were a lot, and we were getting older and more tired, yet still just as drunk, so decided to whittle it down to a Septathlon. Less physically demanding, less rushed, more time for drinking and eating. That stuck for a couple years.
Anyway, long story short, I once again fared extremely poorly in the fruit rolling competition and after a late, dramatic bowl-off, Pierre was crowned champion of the 2025 Pasajcap Triathlon.
Did she really say that?
Probably not, although she might have, and if she did, it would be pretty funny, right? In a double entendre, childishly sexual sort of way. Which is the whole point of “That’s what she said!”, one of my favourite running jokes and clearly Laynni’s favourite phrase of all time.
Anyway, funny story, when forced to explain this classic joke from The Office to someone from another country, whose first language is not English, and whose sense of humour may not be quite so, let’s say, “juvenile”, as ours, it turns out that the whole concept of “that’s what she said” can, at times, sound just the teensiest bit sexual harassment-y. But still in a funny way, right?
Wait, tell us more about the baby hummingbird!
Good news! The one remaining hummingbird chick is alive and well. That’s the good news. The bad news is that we held an extremely democratic vote to choose a name and, in a very close race, somehow decided to go with “Walter”. “Walter V” to be exact, joining Swiss-Canadian Walter, fully Swiss Walter, Dog Walter and Second Dog Walter. In light of all that, we’re kind of hoping we can get “Wally” to stick.
Did I finally master Indirect Object Pronouns in Spanish?
Sadly, no. But I do sort of understand them a little bit now. Usually. Ok, sometimes.
Final 2025 Routinely Nomadic Lake Atitlan Summary and Recap
We had a nice time.
Other useful articles you may want to check out:
If you happen to be considering a visit to wonderful Lake Atitlan and somehow this post did not completely answer all your burning questions, here is some more reading material to help you out.
The Ultimate Guide to Lake Atitlan
Where to Stay: The Best Hotels on Lake Atitlan
Things to Know Before Visiting Lake Atitlan
Best Things to Do on Lake Atitlan
Lake Atitlan Swimming: Best Places for a Dip
What? No brunch at El Barrio?! Are they still serving breakfast of some sort and do you all still go every week? One needs to know. Also, the name Walter V definitely gets my vote.
No, brunch is gone. But you can still order the exact same breakfast if you want, which we did a couple times. But we no longer go every week – we’ve been mixing in some other places, plus we stopped doing the road walk, too much traffic now. So Saturday is just another hiking day with decisions to be made! As for the naming contest, I entered “Walter” as a joke and somehow it won, seems to be an electoral theme these days…