Funny Halloween Sayings for a Spooky Laughs

Halloween is one of those times of year when laughter seems to be the entire point, which is why we have gathered all the best funny Halloween sayings for you to share. And if you’re looking for short funny Halloween sayings for Instagram, we also have you covered.

Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.

Funny Halloween Sayings

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Why did the ghost need first aid? He had a boo-boo.

“Whatever you do … don’t fall asleep.” — Nancy Thompson, “A Nightmare on Elm Street”

“Never trust the living.” – Beetlejuice

99 problems but a witch ain’t one

Why do witches like hotels? They get broom service.

I’m not playing Twix when I say I love this holiday.

Why did the zombie eat brains? He wanted food for thought.

It’s time to get this party startled!

Halloween is going to be great—I can feel it in my bones!

Carving out quality time for spooky season.

Wicked awesome.

“Come out, come out, wherever you are.” — Jack Torrance, “The Shining”

I’m a witch every day. Not just for Halloween.

A ghost unlocks a door with a spoo-key.

What kind of shoes do ghosts wear in the winter? Boo-ts.

“I’m wicked through and through.” – Elphaba, Wicked

What do you call a lost wolf? A where-wolf.

Bad and boo-jee

Time to get this party startled!

BYOBoos

A real witch is nothing without her ghoulfriends

Happy Hallo-weenie!

“Hell is empty and all the devils are here.” — William Shakespeare, “The Tempest”

“On Halloween you get to become anything that you want to be.” – Ava Dellaria

Trick or treat, motherpupper

Get in, loser. We’re going haunting.

What do you call a werewolf with a fever? A hog dog.

Spell-abrate good times!

During the day, I don’t believe in ghosts. At night, I’m a little more open-minded.

With the boo crew

Your costume is so realistic that it’s un-candy!

I’m a haunt mess

Getting kissed by a vampire is a pain in the neck.

“I can thrill you more than any ghost would ever dare try.” — Michael Jackson, “Thriller”

A group of ghosts is called a boo-crew.

I will gourd this candy with my life!

You’re going to Snicker after hearing all of my Halloween puns.

I’ve got tricks and treats up my sleeve.

Basic witch

“Once upon a time, there was a girl and the girl had a shadow.” — Red, “Us”

Pretty sure Gourd of the Rings deserves an Oscar.

“There is nothing that gives more assurance than a mask.” – Collette

With the boo crew

Be witched!

Something wicked this way comes

“I’ll stop wearing black when they make a darker color.” – Wednesday Addams, The Addams Family

“Werewolves howl. Phantoms prowl. Halloween’s upon us now.” – Richelle E. Goodrich

Beware of Resting Witch Face.

Why are mummies always stressed out? They can’t unwind.

If you’ve got it, haunt it

Witcha up to?

Witching you a Happy Halloween!

Trick or treat, bag of sweets, ghosts are walking down the street.

They say it was love at first bite—fangs and all.

Witch, please

Just checked my horror-scope—looks like a killer night ahead.

Straight outta coffin

Can you tell me witch way to the pumpkin patch?

Fangs for the memories.

Having a howling good time!

Witch upon a star.

This is where the magic happens

I can’t Reese-ist a good Halloween pun

It’s witchful thinking.

“A mask tells us more than a face.” – Oscar Wilde, Irish Poet

Let’s carve out some fun

Skeletons don’t have the guts to dress up for Halloween.

What’s a black cat’s favorite song? “Three Blind Mice.”

Happy Halloween to my Hallow-queen.

The ghosts really brought the boo-ty this year.

Bake it in the coven.

Wishing you a spook-tacular night full of chills and thrills.

Did you say treat?

Eat, drink & be scary

So pumped for Halloween I could burst like an overripe gourd.

This letter is sealed with a vampire bite.

May your jack-o’-lantern burn bright all through the night!

Angel by day. Devil by night

I did some exorcise to prepare for all this candy

Halloween’s not the same if I can’t be witch you.

Take heed, ’tis the season for eerie indeed!

Wrapped up and ready—you’re clearly the mummy of the year.

Witching you a Happy Halloween.

What’s up, my witches?

I don’t celebrate Halloween, I am Halloween

Drop dead gorgeous

What do you call an enlightened werewolf? An aware-wolf.

Ghosting is my superpower, deal with it.

Why did the skeleton quit his job? His heart wasn’t in it.

Why don’t witches like winter? Too many cold spells.

Eat, drink, and be scary

I’m bat to the bone.

“What an excellent day for an exorcism.” — Demon, “The Exorcist”

My costume really hit the gourd spot.

I’m witcher than you.

“Sticky fingers, tired feet; one last house, trick or treat!” – Rusty Fischer

No bones about it!

Why did the ghost blow its nose? It had boo-gers.

“Well, fancy! We desire children.” – Winifred Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

Giving my spookiest boo to you and yours this Halloween.

Happy Halloween! We’re back and better. (From the dead.)

I put a spell on you

Frankenstein skips the dance floor with his two left feet.

“Be afraid, be very afraid.” – Ronnie, The Fly

Why was the witch late for work? She over-swept.

Hey, boo, let’s get sheet-faced

bowl of candy corn

World’s okayest pumpkin carver

What’s a monster’s favorite game? Hide-and-go-shriek.

Looking brew-tiful tonight!

“Every day is Hal”There’s only 365 days left until next Halloween!” – The Nightmare Before Christmas

Not going to eat candy? That’s witchful thinking.

Merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but Halloween.

“Round about the cauldron go; In the poison’d entrails throw.” — William Shakespeare, “Macbeth”

It’s time to have some skele-fun

Everything I brew, I brew for you.

Sweet like candy

These costumes are scary good.

Catch me on the dark side

Fangs for the memories

How do ghosts score touchdowns? They get the ball across the ghoul-line.

Why did the invisible man quit his job? He couldn’t see himself doing it.

Straight Outta Salem

I’m only human, I’ve got a skeleton in me

#HotGhoulFall

We’re having a howling good time!

What’s the best lake to visit on Halloween? Lake Eerie.

I have one thing to say about this candy: Bone appétit!

Witching you lots of love!

I know how to drive a stick.

I’ve got a ghost problem — everyone sees right through me.

Howl’s it hanging this Halloween?

Just a broom and a little perfume

Here’s to a Halloween that’s so fun, it’s scary!

If you’re looking for a scare, then come fright this way!

Every angel has a devilish side

I’m just a mere ghost of my former self.

“Clothes make a statement. Costumes tell a story.” – Mason Cooley

“I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.” – L.M. Montgomery

Halloween night Pop Rocks my world

Brrr… it’s cold in here. There must be some spirits in the atmosphere!

I’m ahead of the carve

Hope your Halloween is full of Snickers and (Almond) Joy!

“Where my ghouls at?” – Monster Highloween, isn’t it? For some of us.” – Tim Burton

“It reeks of children!” – Mary Sanderson, Hocus Pocus

If the broom fits, fly it

Where my ghouls at?

“It’s Halloween; everyone’s entitled to one good scare.” – Brackett, Halloween

I will protect this candy with all my gourd.

It’s time to monster mash!

“I put a spell on you because you’re mine.”- Jay Hawkins

Too cute to spook

A cutie that’s a little spooky.

Looking pawsitively bootiful

You know what they say: Keep calm, trick-or-treat and carry on.

“You are all my children now.” — Freddy Krueger

My costume is absolutely eerie-sistible.

Bewitch you were here!

Who wants to join my fang club?

Witch-tastic times ahead.

Hocus pocus, I need coffee to focus

My costume is eerie-sistible

No matter what costumes they wear, when the Halloween candy comes out, everyone is a goblin!

Only bad witches can drive stick

This Halloween is going to be absolutely fang-tastic!

I won’t let you slip through my Butter Fingers

Witches get stitches.

When the witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers ’tis near Halloween.

This is my magic happy potion

You en-witch my life.

How do bats know how to fly? They just wing it.

Why did the werewolf eat a bag of coins? He thought the change would do him good.

Oh my gourd, Halloween is finally here.

Beware of the werecat.

I’ll bet living in a nudist colony takes all the fun out of Halloween.

What do you call an overweight pumpkin? A plump-kin.

Grab your broomstick so we can make a clean getaway.

Don’t make me drop a house on you

I can’t help it… it’s in my blood.

Witch and ghost make merry on this last of dear October days.

“The zombies were having fun / The party had just begun.” — Bobby “Boris” Pickett, “Monster Mash”

You don’t know jack-o’-lantern.

Happy Hallo-weenie!

Wishing you a Halloween filled with tricks and treats.

Happy Hollow-ween!

You’re the treat to my trick

Double, double toil and trouble!

Why didn’t the scarecrow eat dinner? He was already stuffed.

This soup tastes witch-licious!

You know what I like to say: bugs and hisses.

“You’re going to Camp Blood, ain’t ya? — Crazy Ralph, “Friday the 13th”

I hope you like your coffee with scream and sugar.

You make me batty

Killin’ it

What do bats do in their free time? Hang out.

Shake your BOOty

Just out here creepin’ it real, as usual.

Twix or treat!

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… and spiders.

Can I witch a ride? My broomstick broke.

“Where there is no imagination there is no horror.” – Arthur Conan Doyle

Halloween’s the one day you’re supposed to come as you aren’t.

Feeling witchy.

Bat to the bone

Witch better have my candy

It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus

“The soul remains one, shared by two.” — Red, “Us”

Have yourself the happiest of Hollow-weens!

Putting the ‘boo’ in booty

Don’t go goblin up all my candy

Bite me

A nightmare before coffee

Mischief managed

Keep calm and cartilage on

I hope you find this humerus

Here I am, warts and all.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” — Billy Loomis, “Scream”

Why don’t mummies gossip? They don’t want to get a bad wrap.

Howl you doin’?

Boo-in it for the ‘gram

“Love is kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you.” — Classics IV, “Spooky”

A ghost comedian is dead funny.

Don’t forget to do your hair with scare spray on Halloween.

Creepin’ it real

Witch-ful thinking got me here.

Not every witch lives in Salem

“I went trick-or-treating and all I got was a bag full of rocks.” — Charlie Brown

I’m the ghostest with the mostest

Have a fang-tastic night!

Creepin’ it real!

I’ve been there, done bat.

Here’s hoping all your Halloween fears come true.

There is magic in the night when pumpkins glow by moonlight.

Let’s make a witch-tastic team!

Had a spooktacular night!

“Waiting for an invitation to arrive / Goin’ to a party where no one’s still alive.” — Oingo Boingo,

“And to think, if it weren’t for you … I never would’ve danced at all.” — Red “Us”

“Believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see.” – Edgar Allan Poe

Hocus Pocus and chill?

Your costume? Couldn’t scare less.

Ghouls just wanna have fun

child holding a halloween pumpkin over their face

girl dressed as witch, holding pumpkin and broom, portrait

All my best ghoulfriends are total witches

Hope your Halloween is hex-tra special this year.

This is the one time a year I could truly be myself

Ahead of the carve

“We have had our summer evenings, now for October eves!” – Humbert Wolfe

Come Halloween, it’s Crunch time.

A wee bit wicked

I’m here for the boos

Why don’t vampires play baseball? Their bats keep flying away.

If you didn’t get tricked, was it even Halloween?

Still searching for a boo who’s my blood type.

Let’s bone

Looking fur-ocious

There aren’t any skeletons in my closet, but I do have some in my trunk

You better work, witch

Hot ghoul Halloween

It’s going tibia okay!

Witch out for me!

Starbursting to eat all this candy

What do you call a monster who likes to dance? A boogie man.

You know what they say: If the broom fits!

Witch and famous.

Hallow Howl-o-ween!

Halloween makes me so (candy) corny

Waaay ahead of the carve!

“Don’t hang up on me.” — Ghostface, “Scream”

Feeling batty!

Can’t hide it, I love pumpkin spice a whole latte.

Let’s carve out some fun this October!

How are zombie boats operated? With skeleton crews.

You’re sweeter than all the candy that I’ll receive this year.

This will definitely come in candy.

Can’t always get what you wand.

It’s the most frightful time of the fear.

Let’s get spooky

The dead rise again, bats fly, terror strikes and screams echo, for tonight it’s Halloween.

What day of the week do ghosts like best? Moan-day.

What do weight-conscious vampires drink? Blood light.

You’re my fiend for life.

What’s the best way to speak to a giant mummy? Use big words.

Fright Night

100 percent that witch

Cracked jack-o’-lantern? No problem, there’s always a pumpkin patch.

“I’m a homicidal maniac. They look just like everyone else.” – Wednesday Addams, The Addams Family

It’s all treats or all pumpkin. No in-between.

No more treats? This is unBOOlievable

“I be the witch of the wood.” — Thomasin, “The Witch”

Witch better have my candy.

You can always count on a vampire to go for the blood orange.

I’ll be-witcha in a second!

“If you’ve got it, haunt it.” – Rose Pressey

You say witch like it’s a bad thing

Just know that zom-body is thinking of you this Halloween.

A little pumpkin told me it’s your first Halloween. Boo!

I’m just dying to have some fun!

Why did the skeleton go to the butcher? He was looking for spare ribs.

Orange you glad you dressed up for Halloween?

“That’s the problem. He was dead to begin with.” – Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow

What did the werewolf say when he broke his toe? “Ow-oooooh!”

Bugs and hisses, witches!

Don’t forget your spoo-key—this house doesn’t unlock itself.

Carving out fun

Favorite math joke? Easy: pumpkin pi.

Lookin’ gourd-geous!

Hocus pocus and chill?

Why can’t you trust vampires? Because they’re bat to the bone.

You’re in ghoul company

This witch can be bribed with chocolate

Catch me carving out a little fall fun

May chills run down your spine this Halloween.

I wave my wand and put on my cape and wish you lots of treats on this date.

“Have you come to sing pumpkin carols?” – Linus, It’s the Great Pumpkin

Keep calm and carry a wand.

Hey, boo-tiful

Witch parking. All others will be toad.

My horror-scope predicts that this Halloween will be pretty spooky.

The Halloween candy is spook-tacular.

Got a bone to pick with every skeleton at this party.

“Nothing on Earth so beautiful as the final haul on Halloween night.” – Steve Almond

It’s a brew-tiful day for eating tons of candy.

A cat’s favorite candy is a Kit Kat.

New face, who ‘dis?

I’m all tricks, no treats.

“You’re afraid right now, aren’t ya?” — Indrid Cold, “The Mothman Prophecies”

“It’s Halloween. Everyone’s entitled to one good scare.” — Leigh Brackett, “Halloween”

Psst…This isn’t a costume

What do ghosts like to watch on TV? Saturday Fright Live.

Have a wicked good Halloween.

Ghosts have a lot of spirit – literally.

Forever your Zom-bae

If the broom fits, fly it

Have a humerus Halloween

Keep calm and carry a wand

“The boy. Is he dead, too?” — Alice Hardy, “Friday the 13th”

“You ever feel prickly things on the back of your neck? — Cole Sear, “The Sixth Sense”

This is my resting witch face

Happy Halloween from the cutest pumpkin in the patch.

#SquadGhouls

More boos, please

Will you be my ghoul friend?

There is something about a closet that makes a skeleton terribly restless

You’ve got me under your spell.

Who won the skeleton 5K? No body.

Don’t make me get the flying monkeys

Wishing you a fang-tastic Howl-oween!

“It’s alive!” – Frankenstein

This witch likes wine

Fangs for the memories

Trick or tequila

So that is it for our list of Funny Halloween Sayings. We hope you found the perfect one for you!

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