Christmas is a social time and you may be looking for the perfect funny saying to share, which is why we have put together a list of all the best funny Merry Christmas wishes so you can enjoy a chuckle with friends and family. And if you’re looking for funny Merry Christmas sayings, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Funny Merry Christmas Wishes
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Your presents is requested
Dear Santa…can you please define “nice?”
The best thing about the holidays is getting to catch up on sleep and TV shows. Not to forget the food…
I put so much thought into your gift that it’s now too late to get it. Merry Christmas anyway.
May you always find the end of the tape first time.
Christmas cheer? I thought I heard Christmas beer.
Have I been naughty this year? Well, I hope one of the reindeer eats the “naughty” list
Mentally: I am totally ready for Christmas. Financially? I’ll never be ready.
My presence is really the only gift you need. Merry Christmas!
Santa’s nearly here, hooray!
May your fun be large and bills be small this year. Merry Christmas!
The most beautiful part about Christmas is that it’s the last day of all the stress.
Merry Crimbo. Looking forward to catching up in the New Year, once the chaos is over!
Hope your Christmas is as sweet as the cookies you’ll be burning this year!
The best gift you can give me is trying to be nice today!
Let’s drink and be merry.
Who needs presents when I’ve got you!?
May your holidays be as lovely as they look on Instagram
You make me feel merrier than any mulled wine, can’t wait to have some festive fun with you!
Hope you enjoy this “elfie” from us
It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.
May your holiday be full of good times, and may you finally win at family board games this year!
Hope your Christmas is as magical as you made our holidays growing up (minus the stress!)
Christmas Eve is the one night I’m looking forward to morning
What happens under the mistletoe stays under the mistletoe
I would say all I want for Christmas is YOU but, I could really do with some money
All spruced up and ready the jingle the night away
You know it’s Christmas when your wallet is empty but your heart is full
I wish you seasons eatings! Merry Christmas
May your holiday season be so joyful, even your in-laws will seem like fun!
Feelin’ frosty
If kisses were snowflakes, we’d be having a blizzard!
Sweet and twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?
The Christmas alphabet has noel
My spirit animal is Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
Why are Dasher and Dancer always taking coffee breaks? Because they are Santa’s star-bucks!
A Christmas Conspiracy: Olive, the other reindeer…
Leading up to the worst night’s sleep all year
Time for daily chocolate, it really is the most wonderful time of the year!
I hope you like the present you told me to buy for you.
Hope you have a remember-forever-and-ever-and-ever-and-ever kind of holiday
Hope your Christmas is full of joy, laughter, and zero sibling rivalry!
Christmas is Claus for celebration!
Let’s go to the kitchen and whisk everyone a merry Christmas
The reason why we should always jingle all the way is because nobody likes half-assed jingles
Merry Christmas! May your holiday season be as sweet as the cookies you attempt to bake!
May your regifting practice go undetected this year
I would say all I want for Christmas is you, but about that handbag…
“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”
Sleigh my name, sleigh my name
“Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.” – Victor Borge
Hope your Christmas is as lit as your tree (but with fewer tangled lights)!
Time for presents!
Christmas break to-do list: Eat, drink, nap
How do cats greet each other at Christmas? A furry Merry Christmas and happy Mew Year!
Yoda caroling: A Merry Christmas, we wish you. A Merry Christmas, we wish you
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red
I only got you a card in case you got me one…
Wishing you a Christmas as fabulous as you are. No pressure!
Do you know why this Christmas card is so wonderful? Because it isn’t an email and it isn’t a text.
Dear Santa…I can explain
All I want for Christmas is you (and maybe some Christmas cookies, too)
Whoever said ‘all is calm’ has never been to our house around Christmas.
Hope you didn’t forget it’s Christmas. It always comes around this time of the year.
December 25th is the only day I become a morning person
Wishing you a Christmas filled with love, laughter, and no DIY disasters this year!
You had me at ho ho ho
You can never get too many lynx sets at Christmas
100% on the naughty list
But wait—there’s myrrh
Making it count because Christmas only comes once a year
Dear Santa: This isn’t what it looks like
“Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.” – Carol Nelson
Rockin’ each other’s Christmas socks
Yay! It’s Christmas! Let’s buy loads of stuff no one needs!
Here’s my resting Grinch face
Here’s to a Christmas so merry that even your cat can’t knock the tree over!
Wishing you a Christmas so awesome that even Santa can’t keep up with your coolness!
But first, let me take an elfie.
All I want for Christmas is…food!
“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?” – Matt Groening
No lying… We’ve been more naughty than nice!
Hold on for deer life
For your present, it’s either a warm hug or a snug choke-hold. Choose wisely!
My fat pants are ready
Drink up grinches
It’s the most wine-derful time of the year
All the jingle ladies, all the jingle ladies
A mistle-toast to the holiday season
It’s time for our ugly sweaters. It’s Christmas time!
You can get away with being extra cute at Christmas, everything is so twinkly after all.
Ooooooh. We thought you said, “Christmas BEER.”
Wishing you a holiday full of fun, food, and just enough family drama to keep it interesting!
“Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.” – Kin Hubbard
We’re just a bunch of candy canes—sweet and slightly twisted
That warm feeling isn’t just the Christmas spirit. I think you left the oven on.
I put the “ho” in “ho, ho, ho!”
May your Christmas be filled with more laughter than a reindeer at a snowball fight!
Let’s rock around the Christmas tree!
You’re always on my nice list you wonderful human.
Why is it so difficult to think of what to write in a Christmas card?
I’ve finally found the true meaning of Xmas, it’s for those people who can’t spell Christmas!
Let’s get very merry!
“Who’s the bane of Santa’s life? The elf and safety officer.” – Catherine Tate
Wishing you a Christmas that’s as unforgettable as our best nights out. Only with more sleep!
Have a very merry Christmas and remember Christmas calories don’t count…
You better not pout
Merry Christmas! Now, excuse us while we head back to the mistletoe
I hope your smiles will be as big as your credit card bill this Christmas!
May the Christmas season fill our home with joy, hearts with love, and everything I put on my wish list
May your gifts be many, and your returns and exchanges be few
Forget the presents. I’m just here for the cookies. Merry Christmas!
Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and receipts for all major purchases
Snowy hair, don’t care. It’s Christmas!
Worrying about what to do this Christmas season. Just sit down and enjoy the Merry part!
Three phrases that sum up Christmas are: Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men and Batteries Not Included.
Today, I will sleigh Christmas!
Have the best Christmas ever.
You can find us under the mistletoe
“You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.” – Robert Paul
The battle between me and carbs is the real war this Christmas
Wishing you a Christmas so awesome, even Santa will ask to join our next party!
Santa’s got the list, but I’ve got the eggnog. Let’s make this Christmas unforgettable!
You know what I got for Christmas? Fat. I. Got. Fat!
Ho-ho-home for Christmas!
Merry Christmas and a happy new year.
Wishing you a Christmas as fabulous as you are—because anything less wouldn’t do!
I love you from head to mistletoe
May your Christmas be as flawless as your gift-wrapping skills (or at least the effort counts)!
Wishing you a Christmas so merry, even your Christmas sweater can’t keep up with the cheer!
May your Christmas be like Santa – fat, cheerful and abundant!
This one had me at “ho ho ho”!
Being good for goodness’ sake was not enough motivation
I hope Christmas finds you in good spirits! And by spirits, I do mean alcohol.
“I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.” – Henny Youngman
Merry Christmas! May your holiday be filled with awkward family photos and too much food!
We go together like hot chocolate and marshmallows
I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange
May your Christmas be as fat and jolly as Santa after eating too many cookies!
“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan
Hope your Christmas is as cool as you think you are!
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me … What is this, and did you keep the receipt?
You’ll like this present. You gave it to me last year!
All my savings just disappeared! Is this what they meant by Christmas wonder?
All I want for Christmas is you… and cookies… and hot chocolate
Drink up, Grinches! It’s Christmas
Santa saw your Facebook – you’re getting a dictionary this year!
“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” – Andy Borowitz
Besides the tree, guess who’s going to get lit all day?
May your Christmas be filled with as much joy as your in-laws after you win the Christmas board games!
“It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.” – Anon
I’ll even let you warm your feet on me this winter. Love you.
Help, I’m scared of elf on the shelf.
Ho, ho, ho? More like ha, ha, ha!
I’ve decided to give everyone my opinion instead of presents this year. Be excited!
Hope your holiday season is as fun as our group chats – minus the autocorrect fails!
“The perfect Christmas tree? All Christmas trees are perfect!” – Charles N Barnard
Happy Christmas! Yule always be my favourite.
Can’t wait to deck the halls with you.
“That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” – Jerry Seinfeld
Son of a nutcracker!
Shake it like a pole-oriod picture
Yule always be my favourite.
Merry Christmas! May your holiday be filled with more presents than awkward family conversations!
Christmas comes but once a year, but when it comes, it better bring good beer.
It’s beginning to *cost* a lot like Christmas…
I hope you love the present you told me to buy for you. Merry Christmas!
I don’t usually write Christmas cards, but when I do, I usually write the same thing in all of them.
Bah, humbug!
Christmas is a good excuse to send cards to all my favourite people.
Getting more lit than the Christmas tree
Believe in your elf
I only got you a card in case you got me one…
So that is it for our list of Funny Merry Christmas Wishes. We hope you found the perfect one for you!
If you like these, you might also want to check out our other lists of Short Funny Christmas Captions, Christmas Puns and Happy New Year Wishes for Friends and Family.
About the Author
Laynni Locke
Laynni has been sharing her travel adventures and day-to-day life on Routinely Nomadic social media for over 15 years and appreciates the importance of finding the perfect quote or caption to showcase those experiences. Putting her extensive writing and education background to good use, Laynni has become passionate about researching and curating comprehensive lists of all the best quotes and captions for every occasion.